When you hear your new single on the radio...TWICE!!!
For those of you who don't know my story I've been singing since I was 3 years old and performing competitively since I was 6. I was classically trained on the piano for 12 years starting at 6 years old. I started writing music when I was 12 and nabbed my first record deal opportunity when I was 18. All I've ever wanted to do is sing. Well lets be real, all I ever wanted to be was a pop star. I have an amazing family but they never really pushed me to be an artist. They wanted me to be happy and they recognized my talent but that wasn't really what good christian girls from Oklahoma do, run off to LA to be a pop star. So after some pretty devastating no's I let myself truly believe I wasn't good enough. I quit. I quit playing piano, I quit writing songs, and the extent of my singing involved drunken nights at karaoke. I finished my degree, got a "normal job", fell in love, got married, and somewhere in between I learned how to numb the nagging inside of me. The aching that told me I wasn't being true to myself. The little voice that started to shout and say, bitch, get back to music, it's not just a career, it's WHO YOU ARE!
I auditioned for every reality show out there, probably at least three times each, made an appearance on idol, starting singing with my mom's band, but I still wasn't satisfied. There was an artist in me. A creative light that I use to see when I was young and unafraid. So after years of denying myself the real work, the gutsy, dig deep in your fucking soul work, that it takes to discover who you really are as an artist, I started to feel that creative light in me again. I started to write again. I sucked. I knew I sucked. So I reached out for help. I started working with people who were better than me, who could teach me something. I started digging deep into the bullshit I'd been through in my life, the hell that my intuition saw years before it happened. I started listening to myself for once. I shut out everyone else. No matter how important those people were in my life, I had to press pause and listen to Sarah for once.
Someone commented on my video the other day that I had completely screwed myself by calling my song "Fuck It It's Alright". That no radio station would ever play it and I had made the worst marketing decision an artist could make. I knew comments like this would come. I weighed the consequences of using such an overt word and expressing such REAL and HONEST emotions. And again, I chose me. I chose what felt right. This moment that I'm sharing in this video, hearing my song on a radio show that I've listened to for 13 years from a DJ I respect, the SECOND radio show in Dallas to play my song, it feels incredible. Every step of this journey, every inch of what I've gone through has been worth it. It's brought me to the truest version of myself. I don't give a shit about being a pop star anymore. My new goal is to become the best version of me. To finally say, Sarah, you're artistry has finally arrived. You still have a mountain to climb, but you've made the ascent. Not everyone will like it. Not everyone will understand. But I fought my demons, I laid down my fears because I couldn't stand hearing the screaming in my head anymore.
So now when I lay my head down at night and think about what's ahead of me. When I wake up and look outside and say wow, I make a living as a musician, and I work with incredible talent and people that are helping me grow more than I ever could've imagined. I've made it. It's been a life long journey since that 6 year old little girl, and I couldn't be more excited for what's to come!
Thanks for listening!! I love you more than you know if you read all of this lol! xoxo
Check out snippets of my nerdy excitement on Instagram!! http://instagram.com/sarahjsellers